Christmas to be delayed until after an Election

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Jesus, one of the leading characters in The Bible, it to ask God for an extension to Christmas until after a General Election.

Christmas will now probably be around mid-January, with Laura Kuenssberg predicting the 12th or possibly the 13th.

Local Xmas fan, Peter Thape was hoping that Christmas would be in December again, as it has often been, in previous years.

‘Jesus is taking the piss,’ said Thape.

‘He’s clearly a remainer; flaky Liberal,’ added Thape.