Cocaine deliverer to offer side of wedges

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Deliverers of cocaine have been boosted by the news that they are distributing their product quicker than a pizza can be delivered.

Local cocaine salesman, Peter Thape intends to expand his range to include potato wedges, coleslaw and small tubs of gravy.

Thape’s business is growing at 11% per annum, having originally taken a 50% partnership with two of the investors on Dragon’s Den.

‘I like to transport the cocaine in little wraps in my undies,’ said Thape.

‘I can see a problem here with the tubs of gravy,’ added Thape.