Country moves towards referendum on Rooney or Vardy


October 16th is looking the most likely date for a referendum on whether or not your trust is with Coleen Rooney or Rebeka Vardy.

Early polls suggest that 51% of the nation is with Rooney, but Vardy is already talking about a possible second ‘People’s vote.’

Meanwhile, Nato Chief, Sir Peter Thape has promised to stop the conflict in Turkey until the Rooney/Vardy issue is resolved.

‘We should vote on stuff all the time,’ said Thape.

‘We can be trusted with important things,’ he added.