Grouty to run Boris Johnson’s Leadership campaign

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Harry Grout has told Boris Johnson that he’ll be running his leadership campaign from his own Dingley Dell.

Johnson will need to cough up a pack of snout to secure the deal, or face a visit from Samson and Delilah.

Johnson, who will be going to prison for pretending that we’ll all be better off by £350M a week after Brexit, is hoping to share a cell with Lukewarm.

‘I’ll be going gay for the stay,’ said Johnson.

‘Got me through Eton,’ added Johnson.