Leading racist, Adolph Hitler is looking to buy a tranquil summer retreat in Burnley.
Top World War 2 bad guy, Hitler has been scouring Europe for a suitable eagles nest to base his next wave of Aryan supremacy.
Hitler has chosen a nice spot on Pendle Hill overlooking some very safe BNP seats in the towns below.
‘A lovely area; think we can do some great work here,’ said Hitler.
‘We can also see the enemy, Nelson, from here,’ he added.