More celebrities to die in 2017


God, one of the leading characters in the bible, has announced that the end of 2016 will not necessarily mean that celebrities will stop dying.

Without naming names, God has suggested that more famous people will not survive 2017, and has additionally said that non famous people will also meet their end in the coming year. The Almighty has pointed out that an increase in the number of celebrities overall, has forced him to send disproportionate numbers to St. Peter in 2016, but that figures were slightly below budget in 2015.

‘Nobody complains when I lamb-hook a kiddie-fiddling celeb, do they?’ asked God.

‘I have to kill 1400 people a day in England alone. It’s the worst part of my job, I admit,’ The Deity added.