People hoping to shoot up a school or a shopping centre able to park closer now


People with psychotic tendencies have welcomed the news that the right to disabled parking is to be extended to those with mental health problems.  

For too long, those people who have been planning to kill large groups of people have been forced to get a regular, and often costly parking place near to the intended event.

Local burgeoning mass murderer, Peter Thape (17) has admitted that the demanding price, and poor positioning of regular parking has made the transportation of weapons and heavy ammunition less attractive.

‘You can be walking round shooting for ages, and then you’ve got the whole police stand-off thing; it can take hours,’ claimed Thape.

‘Free disabled parking is a real boost. The meters near me are £2.70 for just 30 minutes – madness,’ added Thape.