Public encouraged to burp more in ongoing Carbon Dioxide shortage


The public are being asked increase their intake of burp inducing foods in a bid to boost threateningly low stock levels of CO2.

Experts differ in their appreciation of the problem, with some believing that more burping would help, whilst others are thinking that we should ration our burps in these austere times.

From Monday each household will be sent a balloon which they will be encouraged to burp into and inflate, thus freeing the nation of the industry shortfall.

‘We may send an apple to each house, too,’ said a CO2 expert.

‘You can get some proper violent burps off them,’ added the expert.