The Queen is to take a reduced sized county as payment for her overtime, weekend speech.
In the current spirit of the nation, The Queen will only take 80% of her usual appearance fee when addressing the country tomorrow.
This could well mean owning Cornwall, or Devon as opposed to one of the bigger shires.
‘We are all making sacrifices at this time,’ said The Queen.
‘I have restricted all my staff to just one castle,’ she added.