Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, who had a very shiny nose due to an undiagnosed case of Rhinophyma, has finally been offered backdated compensation.
Rudolph’s disability, which was clearly based on his appearance, led to frequently being shunned by work colleagues, and additionally being excluded from all reindeer activity.
The reindeer’s legal counsel have pointed out that only when Rudolph’s painful condition became a useful method of navigation for a sleigh, was Rudolph welcomed back into the employment family.
‘I just wanted to belong. I was cheap, and hated myself. I’ve lived with it for years,’ said Rudolph.
‘Children, don’t forget to sing about Rudolph the whore this Christmas!’ added Rudolph.