‘Science can go f*ck itself!’ says Boris

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Boris Johnson has changed the government mantra of following the science, to ‘Science can go fuck itself!’

Johnson explained that he was only following the science for a bit, until people got too bored at home, and we needed to start the Premier League again.

Johnson told Cutting News that when he first suggested following the science, he hadn’t realised that the weather would be so lovely.

‘People need to be having essential barbeques,’ pointed out the Prime Minister.

‘Science isn’t going to pay the bills, is it!’ added Johnson.