Stage invasion boosts UK to a top 24 finish


Sympathy votes poured in for the invaded UK Eurovision act, boosting SuRie’s final position to a highly respectable third from bottom.

The UK, who would have finished bottom even if The Beatles would have entered, left the contest with their head held high.

Local viewer, Peter Thape is not even gay, but still watched the whole evening’s entertainment, which lasted a paltry four hours.

‘I could have done another hour,’ said Thape.

‘My real fear was that she would sing it again. Kill me,’ added Thape.