Theresa May pulls a sickee

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Theresa May has fucked off work today, knowing that everyone’s going to be taking the piss out of her.

May cleverly set up the whole day off thing, by pretending that she had a sore throat in work last night.

May phoned up this morning with her best croaky voice, and said she’d already been sick twice, and was better off working from home.

‘I hate work at the moment; I’m going on that Totaljobs this morning,’ said May.

‘Might go back on Linkedin,’ added May.