Thought of sprouts just spoiling the day

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Parents and children everywhere are waking up to the knowledge that any pleasure received from a new iPad or selection box will be heavily offset by the presence of sprouts at the dinner table.

When Jesus originally decreed that all future celebrations of his birthday should be marked by a small green vegetable, it’s more likely that he meant garden peas. Peter Thape (46) from Southport, starts planning ways of disposing of his plated sprouts months beforehand. Last year, the Xmas day fire he started in one of the children’s bedrooms neatly distracted people whilst he slung out his sprouts.

‘Probably won’t get away with another fire. But I’ve something special this year – been taking magic classes’ said Thape.

‘Some sleight of hand should get the sprouts into my serviette, then into my pocket, and a trip to the toilet – bingo.’ Thape added.