Underpaid nurses can’t quite find a ventilator for Boris

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Woefully underpaid nurses have not been able to find a ventilator for infected Prime Minister, Boris Johnson.

Nurses have been looking everywhere for a ventilator for Johnson, after he contracted Coronavirus earlier today.

Local nurse, Murial Hislop, has been looking under beds, inside cupboards, everywhere in fact, but just can’t quite seem to find one.

‘Wonder if he remembers not signing up to the EU ventilator scheme now?’ asked Hislop.

‘Imagine if that Jeremy Hunt gets it!’ she added.