Vera Drake moves to Northern Ireland in order to keep working

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Vera Drake has moved her knitting needles and bleach cottage industry to Belfast in order to maintain a living.

With Southern Ireland joining the twentieth century yesterday, Northern Ireland remains the only country with a ‘Starbucks’ where a women can’t get a legal abortion.

Drake has been offered permanent employment by The Democratic Unionist Party, who have asked Drake to talk at their upcoming Flat Earth Conference.

‘I’m reading a piece from the Bible about shaming harlots,’ said Drake.

‘Then I’m doing a power point on How Dinosaurs never existed,’ added Drake.