We’re only pretending to like you, Britain tells corner shops


Britain has admitted that they’re only using corner shops and mini marts temporarily until the whole virus shit blows over.  

Local bread buyer, Peter Thape told Cutting News that he’ll be finishing with the corner shop as soon as the whole queueing, one in one out nonsense ends at Tesco.

Thape bought a bread from his corner shop yesterday, and kept his angry thoughts to himself about the price, whilst he faked a friendly chat with the shopkeeper.

‘£1.45. The fucker,’ thought Thape.

‘Enjoy your moment. You’ll be lucky if I ever buy a Twix again from here when this is over,’ he added to his thoughts.