And the actual winner of the EU Referendum is…Remain

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Controversy and confusion has broken out with the result of the EU referendum, after it has been revealed that the wrong results envelope was read out.

Jubilation has broken out across the nation as former UKIP leader, Nigel Farage pointed the actual winning notification of ‘Remain’ towards the camera. Regular drunk, Peter Thape voted Brexit, because of his general unease about brown people, but even he accepts that the new result is a better one for the nation, even though it means a return to power for pig molester, David Cameron.

‘I’ve had a bit of a think about it now, and it’s probably better that ‘Remain’ won,’ said Thape.

‘Plus brown people are probably ok; and what would we have done for curries and that?’ added Thape.