‘Everyone to get one million pounds each, after Brexit,’ says Boris Johnson

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Brexit-causing, nutjob, billionaire, Boris Johnson has repeated his claims that Britain will be awash with money after the Brexit deal has been done.

Johnson, who is actually a grown up and has an adult’s job, has spent the morning plucking figures out of nowhere for the nation’s amusement.

Johnson reiterated that each person will receive a new car, a classy hooker, and a large McDonald’s meal as part of the new deal.

‘There’ll probably be one million pounds for each adult…maybe two,’ offered Johnson.

‘Kids may only get half a million each; maybe more when I’m leader,’ added Johnson.