Theresa May running down the fridge at No 10

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Soon-to-be former Prime Minister, Theresa May is emptying the fridge, so that the new guy/girl doesn’t inherit a load of free gear.

May went to Aldi this morning and was seen picking up a small milk, instead of the bigger one that she normally gets for her usual bowls of Multigrain Hoops.

May was also seen buying a smaller two-pack of sausage rolls instead the usual lunchbox filler 12 pack that she’d routinely purchase on a Monday.

‘Whoever’s in here tomorrow, can fuck right off,’ said Prime Minister, May.

‘I’ll leave them that tangerine; but when you turn it over, it’s all manky,’ added May.