Vladimir Putin to present last two Saturday Night Takeaways

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Vladimir Putin is to fill the vacant seat of Ant McPartlin, before invading Europe, and setting up extermination camps across Poland.

It has long been suspected that Putin was about to join the team with Scarlett Moffatt, and Stephen Mulhern, but more of a surprise that he was about to emulate Adolph Hitler, as Boris Johnson has suggested.

Putin has also revealed that his cameo appearance in Call the Midwife is scheduled for Sunday the 32nd of March.

‘I hope the girls on Loose Women don’t go too hard on me,’ said Putin, ahead of his appearance.

‘Going on Loose Women could affect my credibility in Russia, before we invade Czechoslovakia with all our nerve gas and stuff,’ added Putin.