Children could start free thinking, say worried Faith Schools leaders

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Faith school Head Teachers got together this weekend to discuss the problem of pupils starting to think on their own, without their daily indoctrination of fairy stories.

Local Head Teacher Rev. Peter Thape urged parents to continue the propagation of bullshit stories to their impressionable children before they break free.

Rev. Thape advised parents to use recent floods, wildfires, and the pandemic to show God’s anger about their child looking at porn.

‘Use chocolate eggs and bunnies as a reward for believing made-up shit,’ said Rev. Thape.

‘It’s what Jesus would have done,’ he added.