A & E welcoming back the usual dickheads tonight

a and e

Accident and Emergency staff are braced to welcome back the usual cocks tonight, as society reopens.

Fresh from saving lives in the world pandemic, triage staff will return to the familiar world of pumping stomachs and patching up the drunken wounded.

A & E doctor, Peter Thape is looking forward to being spat at, as he marshalls a fight between a drunken couple around midnight.

‘They’ll have been clapping in the street for us a few weeks ago,’ said Thape.