Flag on your car a fairly good sign that you’re a cock

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The National Society for Cocks (NSC) has instructed its members to make sure that they are flying an England flag on their cars by the time of the opening game of the World Cup today.

The NSC have told members to remove ‘red noses’ off the grill of their cars too, reminding them that the campaign has now finished.

NSC spokesman, Peter Thape has also encouraged members to buy full England kits, including socks, for all their children.

‘Or, just get an England T-shirt from a supermarket for £20 – it’s great value,’ said Thape.

‘A flag from your upstair’s window looks good, too,’ added Thape.