‘High street bank closures costing us business,’ says leading bank robber

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Leading bank robbers have been expressing their disappointment at the number of individual branches that are being withdrawn from the high street.    

The Secretary of The National Union for Heisters, Peter Thape believes that his members are being unfairly targeted by the big banks.

Thape adds that having less banks reduces the opportunities for his members to succeed in their chosen profession, and thus become more socially mobile.

‘This is another story of big business treading on the little guy,’ said Thape.

‘It’s not just us who are affected, but support businesses like balaclava makers, knuckle-duster manufacturers, and designers of black clothing,’ added Thape.