Parents are rejoicing at the school summer fair being cancelled due to the worldwide viral pandemic.
Mums and dads can generally expect to spunk off between £50 and £100 in tombola tickets, shit books, and bouncy castles.
Local dad, Peter Thape attended the school Christmas fair in December, where he secretly wished for a deadly virus that would close all the schools in time for the summer fair.
‘Perhaps Santa does exist?’ wondered Thape.
‘I’m actually financially better off after this virus,’ thought Thape.