Woman moves into the thick pyjamas stage of the marriage

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A woman has moved into the fleece-style impenetrably thick pyjama phase of her marriage, ensuring that her husband’s predictable fumblings have no effect at all.

36 year old Murial Hislop’s comfortable and warm pyjamas are also suitably thick enough to resist pokes in the lower back, and her husband’s usual set of unromantic moves used to initiate mating.

After an initial two week period, where her husband returned each night for another clumsy attempt, Hislop is now sleeping through, quite undisturbed.

‘Bless him, he really tried, but the buttons were too thick for him,’ said Hislop.

‘We have two lovely children; I think we’ve finished with all that nonsense now,’ added Hislop.