Manager of under 10’s talks for longer than Martin Luther King

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The already exhausting presentation evening for the Cressington Junior football teams has been extended by the manager of the Rockets, who mistakenly thought he was addressing the UN.

The gathered mums and dads at Cressington Workingmen’s club had already been clapping for 2 hours  to celebrate the season of the under 6’s, 7’s, 8’s and 9’s before Rockets Manager, Peter Thape came to his feet.

Thape methodically described each player’s performance over the season, before ending the hour long speech with a run-down of each fixture’s result.

‘Had them in the palm of me hand,’ said Thape.

‘Being able to hold a crowd is a skill – we can’t all do it,’ added Thape.