Roman Abramovich to move to Israel, and buy Palestine


Israel-bound Chelsea owner, Roman Abramovich, has offered a surprise solution to the Middle-Eastern peace problem, by offering to buy Palestine.

Palestine will become a training facility for the Israel National Football team, with state of the art 4G pitches, and a 200,000 sq ft indoor complex.

A genetics centre will investigate Lionel Messi, and Mohammed Salah’s possible Jewish heritage, as Abramovich looks to turn Israel into a dominating footballing power.

‘Palestinians can become ball boys, and corner flag holders – everyone will be happy,’ said Abramovich.

‘My money helped save English football, and now peace in Israel – Yeh!’ added Abramovich.