Scottish people much too small to win the World Cup

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FIFA have agreed with the sentiments of Scottish manager Gordon Strachan that Scottish people are simply too small to qualify for the World Cup Finals.

At the next qualifying campaign, Scotland will be placed in a Group A with Lilliput, The Borrowers, and tournament favourites, The Umpa Lumpas.

The Group A winners will meet the winners of Group B for a place in the Finals. Group B will consist of Snow White and The Seven Dwarves, Herve Villachaize, and Spain.

‘Most Scottish people are only about 3 feet tall,’ said Strachan.

‘Our main striker, Jimmy Cranky had to track back for every corner,’ added Strachan.