‘Shitty Pound Shop Ashes trophy not worth winning,’ say England

The England Cricket team have said that they won’t bother winning the Ashes until the trophy becomes a bit better.

The trophy, which was bought from Poundstretcher over two hundred years ago is just rubbish, and Captain, Joe Root told Cutting News his concerns.

Root said that his kids get better trophies just for getting to a cup final in the under 6’s – one of the trophies was bigger than my son, he said.

Bring out a proper cup, and then we’ll try properly,’ said Root.

‘What a dick I’d look lifting that up – glad we didn’t win it,’ added Root.