‘Top 17 finish will be success,’ says Mourinho

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Fully mental football manager, Jose Mourinho has changed his ambitions from winning the league, to avoiding relegation.

Mourinho, who is impatiently waiting to be sacked, is keen to take his theatrics to any club who still remember how good he was, many years ago.

Before he leaves, he hopes to end the career of one or two more players, by signing them in the January transfer window.

‘With hard work, and a little luck, we can still finish in the top 17,’ said Mourinho.

‘Then, next year, maybe top 15,’ added the nutcase.