Trump to do a massive dump on the Palace dinner table

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Fears are growing that special needs President, Donald Trump may pull his pants down and crimp out a Royal loaf in front of the Queen.

Parts of the dinner table have been taped off to prevent the midget-handed nutcase mounting the crockery and filling the fondue with his steaming fondant.

Signs and arrows have been put in place that will direct the President to a nearby toilet in case he should feel the colon pleasure rising.

‘We’re going to keep him on baby reins, and heavily muzzled,’ said one of his staff.

‘It’s for your own protection; he has a type of political Tourette’s,’ he added.