People who are not paying the bills keen for it to be colder

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Children and parasitic adults are hoping that the run up to Christmas becomes colder and colder, ending in a traditional seasonal snowfall.

But bill-payers around the country are revelling in the milder weather, especially those who are financially supporting a December light festival in their homes. Peter Thape (46) from Salford is now being allowed to turn off the heating for up to 2 hours a day, which he appreciates, having recently watched his wife plug another set of decorative fairy lights into the last unused plug socket.

‘I’ve counted them. There’s 712 lights twinkling away. It’s like The Trafford Centre in here,’ said Thape.

‘We could have one of those stalls selling phone cases, but there’s nowhere for them to plug in,’ added Thape.