God investigates new clothing range

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God, one of the leading characters in the bible, has asked all his followers to wear the same uniform; lightweight trousers/skirt and a polo top, both embossed with the distinctive God logo. 

The Lord has also made a hoodie available, bearing the God motif, for a chilly day. The Almighty is reacting to criticism that his followers are being asked to wear wildly different types of clothing, despite all worshipping the same ultimate being. Men in big hats, men in long dresses, and some men with beards but no moustaches have all claimed to be the most appropriately kitted-out.

‘When I invented Mankind, I imagined you all in a stiff-collared T-shirt,’ said God.

‘Plus, it will be a little harder for you to hate one another, if you all dress the same,’ added God.